Throwing Away Negativity

Everybody has bad days, but I try to give the girls other options besides staying angry or negative.  There are a few different ways I've managed to do this.

1. Throw your negativity away!

One of the girls (her identity will remain anonymous) came home in a very bad mood and snapped at me.  I could've gotten angry at her, but that would've just fueled the anger.  So I told her to go to the front door and throw all of her negativity away, because whatever had happened, happened somewhere else and not at our house so she needed to throw it back where it came from.  Her first reaction, "Are you kidding me?" 

When she realized I wasn't kidding, she thought it was funny, did what I told her too, and then she was back to her normal self.

2. Name 3 positive things

When the girls get into an extremely negative mood and everything that comes out of their mouth is negative, (i.e. "I hate spaghetti" "I hate rice")  I say, name three positive things about (it).  At first they would try to disguise a negative comment for a positive, but if they do that I add 3 more positive things to think of (6 total) which they don't like.  It's been quite a while since I've had to pull this one out, but the point isn't to completely annoy them (even though I know it does) it's just a nice way to make them more self-aware of how negative they're being.  One of the funniest ones I've heard said...when I said, "Say 3 positive things about your sister",I was told, ""at least she's not a twin.  :-)

3. Go throw a fit where I can't see you, then come back and be normal again.

Same kind of situation, just them fighting with one another or being angry.  I will tell them (individually)  "go to the basement away from everyone else...stomp your feet, yell, scream, say what you're feeling, take a pillow (not one of the good ones) with you if you want something to hit.  Do this for 10 minutes.  I will knock on the door and let you know when your time is up".  

I know what you're thinking...how will they hear the knock when the 10 minutes are up.  That's the funny part.  After the first couple of minutes they say everything they wanted to say, yell as much as they wanted to yell, and their words and yells become more sporadic.  You can tell they are just trying to think of something else to say.  When time is up they are always happier.  I haven't used this one very much but every time I have, it works like a charm.